Cooperation and Trust worksheet

Nurturing the Spiritual Life of Your Meeting Through Cooperation and Trust

Facilitator: Rick Ells, University Friends Meeting

Cooperation

Principles

1. Individuals accept costs to build and sustain a shared good not otherwise obtainable
2. Together they build a shared understanding of the shared good, bring it to life, and nurture it going forward
3. People have many gifts and can play various roles in making their contributions (Corinthians 12:4)

Exercise One - What Is Your Meeting's "Shared Good"?

What are attributes of the "Shared Good" you seek in your meeting. The following table suggests some possible attributes that may or may not be on your list. Select the ones meaningful to you. Suggest others not on the list that come to mind.

Attributes	Five Most Important	Less Important	Not Relevant
Affirm and nurture personal spirituality
Inclusive community
Willingness to work issues through
Open to new insights
Active as a meeting in political issues
Tender community, willing to share deeper feelings
Provide money and other help to needy members
Help pay living expenses of all members
Maintain Meeting property
Emotional and physical safety of members
Stability of the Meeting over time
Exploring Quaker history and writings
Connecting with greater Quaker community

Support You Provide

What kinds of costs are you willing to accept to help build and support your Meeting's Shared Good?

Attributes	Five Most Important	Less Important	Not Relevant
Maintenance on the Meeting house
Care of Meeting house grounds and gardens
Serving on committees
Making contributions to pay for Meeting expenses
Making coffee and refreshments
Helping with childcare
Helping with teenager (junior friends) program
Serving on Yearly Meeting committees
Helping clean up Meeting house after worship and events
Growing vegetables and other foods for Meeting meals
Providing transportation for elderly and infirm members
Participating in business meetings
Studying Quaker history and writings individually or together

The Vegetable Garden Metaphor

Think of your Meeting as a garden of vegetables. The costs are the work you do in caring for the vegetable plants as they grow. The Shared Good is in the growth of the plants and the nutritious products they bring forth. A few beginning thoughts:

• "In the power of God and his immortal Seed dwell." George Fox, epistle 209, 1661
• Each plant grows from its own seed.
• Each plant grows according to its inner character (seed or genes) and interaction with the world around it (which the gardeners helps provide)
• You can't make a tomato plant grow tomatoes faster by pulling on it.

Describe the Meeting environment and processes that would nurture the growth and fulfillment of your inner Seed.

Trust

Building shared trust nurtures more openness, initiative and sharing within the Meeting community. Think about the people in your community you trust (your trust network). What has nurtured your connection with and trust for these people?

Actions	Increases Trust	Decreases Trust	No Impact on Trust
Always comes to committee meetings
Regularly arrives late to meetings
Does not respond to emails or phone calls
Keeps people they are working with informed
Gives time and attention to the thoughts and feelings of others
Uses Meeting resources for personal needs and does not replenish them
Supports others in discerning and following their spiritual directions
Sends frequent unrequested messages to members
Makes commitments but does not show up
Gives time and resources to care for members in need
Has a sense of humor
Participates in inter-generational activities
Uses Quaker ways and processes
Apologizes when things screw up and tries again

Bonus topic: How do you or your community work with someone who has difficulty building trust relationships with others?

Resources and References

Popular Writings

• Healing the Heart of Democracy: The Courage to Create a Politics Worthy of the Human Spirit by Parker Palmer

Quaker Writings

The words "trust" and "cooperation" rarely occur in most Quaker writings. Instead the emphasis is on each individual living with integrity and honesty so that they would be worthy of trust and have the respect for others that is essential to cooperation. These ideas are explored in the following books.

• Cooperation and Coercion as Methods of Social Change by Vincent Nicholson, Pendle Hill Pamphlet #1
  
• Friends for 350 Years by Howard H. Brinton, historical update and notes by Margaret Hope Bacon
• No Cross, No Crown by William Penn
• Quaker Spirituality: Selected Writings edited by Douglas Steere
• Listening Spiritually: Personal Spiritual Practices Among Friends by Patricia Loring
• Listening Spiritually: Corporate Spiritual Practice Among Friends by Patricia Loring
  

Science Stuff

• Super Cooperators: Altruism, Evolution, and Why We Need Each Other to Succeed by Martin A. Nowak
• Trust and Reciprocity: Interdisciplinary Lessons From Experimental Research edited by Elinor Ostrom and James Walker